Paranoia

There is a strange paranoia
I am feeling towrds myself,

as if the world around me
will shatter,

and I want it to shatter very badly.

Everyday is a burden
on the heart,

too heavy to keep
or
to throw away,

The last thing I remember
is a shadow in my dream,

A shadow which is coming
towards me to slit my throat,

and there is blood all over me.

It is not red , it is black
the colour of dark.

The colour of fear.